do what makes you feel alive

happy THURSDAY! (i'm GOING to be consistent in getting these posts out on wednesdays, someday. but not today...) i'm really excited about this post! almost one month ago, i attended alison's brand workshop. in short, it was amazing. i've been trying to ponder & take in allllll of the goodness & insight i gained from the workshop as well as start applying it & my life is seriously changed. 

at the workshop, we talked about & delved in REAAAAAL deep about our "why." i went into the workshop thinking about my photography business & came out thinking about my blog, photography business, day job & good grief. because THEY ALL CONNECT. my mind was blown & now i'm going to tell you a little bit more & share my why with you.

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i consider myself an introverted extrovert. when i'm with my people, i have all the confidence in the world. i'm not afraid to go up on the stage & sing, dance, whatever. i'm not scared. when i'm in a room full of new people by myself, i legit cry & want to go home. i don't like being alone or feeling alone.

the first fall after graduating high school, all of my friends went to college & i stayed home because my first semester didn't start until january. i was lonely & really unsure of what i was doing with my life. i was lucky enough to get a job working with my sister, so i moved in with her & worked until it was time to go to school. but i still didn't have very many friends. i decided that fall that i would start a blog. it was on a whim & i wasn't sure what to call it, so i called it "livin the dream." that was a phrase that my dad always used when people asked him what he was doing with his life. (he still does this) it's kind of a facetious answer, but the older (& obvs more mature) i've gotten, i've realized how true that statement is & that it is more than just a little phrase. 

my livin the dream blog got me out of my comfort zone. i met new friends. i shared my college adventures (as much as you can in the winters of rexburg) & my mission stories + memories. after my mission, i started going out & doing fun things as well as dreaming up things that i could do to live the dream. it got me out of the house & helped me to truly live in a time that i was pretty lonely & sad to be in. 

when i got married, i upgraded livin the dream to "the banks blog" & then rebranded to "sadie banks" but here's my secret: livin the dream is still my why. every time i think about it, i come back to that. blogging makes me feel alive. it pushes me to get out & DO stuff. i truly enjoy creating content. when we were in the "don't tell anyone" stage of infertility, blogging was my outlet. writing was my outlet. i wrote on my phone & wrote in my journal. but i also shared stuff on my blog. it helped me be happy when i was sad & lonely. (because aaa-oooo infertility is hekkkka lonely) & then i jumped into blog photography head first & that made me feel alive. then i started working full-time at boostability & i felt alive again too. i was excited to get up & go to work!! & then after mack died, i was in a dark, dark place & good grief came along & made me feel alive again. 

& now, i want to share that feeling. not just the feeling, but i want to tell you to do what makes you feel alive. whatever that may be. do it. if you're not sure, start trying new things until one of them feeds your soul & helps you get out of bed in the morning. you don't have to turn it into a business, just do it for yourself. 

the future is pretty unknown for me (us-- newsflash: it is always that way. so live in the moment & enjoy the now). & right here, right now: i'm happy. i feel so, so good about what's in store. i had a goal to go full-time with photography at the beginning of the year, but the more i've thought about that over the last two months, the more i've realized that i love my job. i love photography too, but i also love my job. & since i've been pretty successful (there have been a few hiccups) at doing both, i'm going to continue doing both. i love that i have the ability to grow my blog more & hope to be able to put a bit more focus on that in the coming months + year. but for now, again, i feel so, so happy & good about where we're at. i. am. living.

so here at sadie banks the blog (& irl), i hope you feel encouraged to chase your dreams & do what makes you feel alive because that, my friend, will change your life.