Hey Women's Marchers, I'll Gladly Take Your Baby

I have to add this disclaimer that posting this worries me. I am more than scared of the potential backlash that could be with a post as controversial as this. I hope that you'll read to understand instead of reading to respond. Please be kind, should you choose to respond. 

Now, you have to understand something: I believe in women's rights and equality. I believe women should have the right to vote. I believe women should be educated. I believe that women shouldn't be objectified because of their bodies. I think women are strong. I think women have a special voice. I think women are incredible humans with the ability to do anything they put their minds to.

But yesterday, hundreds of thousands of women all over the world, protested and marched in favor of abortion. I'm aware there were other reasons to march, but abortion and the pro-choice stance were a HUGE reason. It was a big enough reason that Feminist Activists that are Pro-Life were not invited and not welcome to march.

As I scrolled through my Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook feeds yesterday I saw multiple crude signs and posts advocating the idea of "my body, my choice." I understand wanting to have the power to control what happens to your body. I get it, I really do. You don't want to get pregnant. You don't want to have a baby. You'd rather not be a mom. That's fine. 

However, some of us want the opportunity to be a mom more than anything.

Did you know that one in eight women struggles with infertility? Did you know that the average IUI fertility treatment costs over $800? Or that IVF costs anywhere between $12,000-$15,000 and that most insurances will not cover it?

Did you know that the average adoption wait time is between 2 and 7 years-- even though there are roughly 400,000 children already in the US foster care system with over 100,000 of them waiting to be adopted? And an estimated number of over 18 million orphaned children in the world waiting to be adopted. But not only that, the average cost of an adoption is anywhere from a few hundred dollars up to $30,000 with the average cost being around $28,000--not including travel and lodging fees if adopting outside of the country.

The average birth control pill costs $0-$50 a month. An IUD costs $0 up to $1000. (But you can usually get an IUD for free or reduced price because of Obamacare) You can go here to find more birth control options if you don't like the pill or the idea of getting an IUD. I want your baby. I'd give anything for the moment where the pregnancy test is positive. I'd do anything to have my body change, gain weight, stretch, grow and be forever different because there is a baby inside me. And my husband and I have only been trying for 10 months. In the eyes of medical professionals, we technically aren't infertile yet and we won't be for another 2 months. I can't even imagine how the couples and women who have been trying for years to conceive feel and felt as they watched and saw you so flippantly chant and joke about the fact that it is "your body, your choice."

Can you see why I don't support your march? Can you understand why I didn't participate? Will you take a second to see things from my perspective? Will you take even longer to try and see things from those that have struggled with infertility for a long time's perspective?

I feel so strongly that the voice of those women who weren't represented in the Women's March needed to be voiced. Those voices need to be heard. 

Today in church we sang a hymn its words hit me to the very core. The words read, "Where can I turn for peace? ... When with a wounded heart, anger, or malice, I draw myself apart, searching my soul? ... Where, when my aching grows... where is the quiet hand to calm my anguish? Who, who can understand? He, only One. He answers privately, reaches my reaching. In my Gethsemane, Savior and Friend. Gentle the peace he finds for my beseeching. Constant he is and kind, Love without end." 
[Where Can I Turn for Peace? Hymn no. 129, LDS Hymn Book]

You may not believe in God, and that's okay. But I was able to find peace today through my faith in my Heavenly Father and His Son, Jesus Christ. I know you'll never completely understand my side. And I'll never completely understand yours. But I believe that They understand both of us completely and with the greatest love that we could ever imagine. Their perfect love truly does change lives. Their love makes these differences of opinion and experiences okay for me. I hope you can find something in your life that can help make these different opinions okay for you too.