what women want.

Three years ago, I went to a girls' camp especially for Laurels (girls age 16-18). During the week that we were there we had many discussions on becoming the women we need to be to be great wives and mothers. One of the talks was about consistently doing the small things to become strong-- reading scriptures, praying, going to  church, etc. I don't remember much of what was said, but this line has stayed with me:

"A

stripling warrior

doesn't want a girl who is coasting."

I've thought about this line a LOT since then and as I was thinking about it recently, it seemed kind of one-sided. And 

I realized that, well, I don't want a boy who is coasting either. 

The standard has been set for girls. That's for sure. We are told often things like this: "

The world has enough women who are tough; we need women who are tender. There are enough women who are coarse; we need women who are kind. There are enough women who are rude; we need women who are refined. We have enough women of fame and fortune; we need more women of faith. We have enough greed; we need more goodness. We have enough vanity; we need more virtue. We have enough popularity; we need more purity.”

Margaret D. Nadauld, β€œThe Joy of Womanhood,”

Ensign,

Nov. 200

0

And we certainly do.

Are the boys told what we as girls need in a guy? I don't know. But I'll tell you now. 

With the previous quote in mind, I thought of all of the things that we as women need in our men. Especially our Priesthood bearing men.

The world has enough men who are vulgar; we need more men who are

worthy

. There are enough men who are distracted; we need more men who are

attentive and focused on the right things

. There are enough men who give in or give up; we need more men who are

diligent

. There are enough men who are rough; we need more boys who are

loving

. There are enough men who are skeptical; we need more

men of faith

. There are enough men who are rough around the edges; we need more men who are

tender

. There are enough men who are weak (not in terms of muscles); we need more men who are

strong

. There are enough men with quick tempers; we need men who are

striving to be patient

There are enough men who walk out; we need more men who 

will stay to be fathers

There are enough men who look for cheap experiences; we need more men who

look for an eternal experience

Guys, we need you. It's a simple fact of life. We need your strength and your testimonies. Remember what you know. And live what you know. You have the ability to become so much more than you may believe. 

I was given a really wonderful piece of advice last year and I want to share it with everyone:

"Look for your spouse in all of the places you would want them to be." 

If you want a temple marriage-- prepare for one NOW! {The best time to plant a tree is twenty years ago. The second-best time is NOW} If you want a temple worthy spouse-- look where temple worthy people would be. 

Boys, Men, Fellas, Gentlemen, Friends:

Get out there and go on a date or something.

Here

are some ideas even!

There are PLENTY of great girls out there. But please be realistic in your ideals. Plus, look at what can happen when you do! 

photo credit: Debby Leavitt Photography

photo credit: Debby Leavitt Photography

I am no dating or marriage expert. But I know that lasting marriages and families are possible. But they require a lot of effort... Or so I'm told. 

P.S. This is not a cry for a date. So don't take it that way. And I'm serious.